Why you don’t have to sacrifice SEXY to be smart & successful

jmorales952000
Sep 27, 2014
3 min read

For years - I've been told, "Make sure they know you're more than just a pretty face." My mind - confused by the notion that I was anything less - couldn't quite grasp this new concept. It was the beginning of my journey in a powerful medium - a visual medium called television news.

Years before my quest for a career that possessed something meaningful, I was - if you've read my blog "Waxing for a Living" an Esthetician in California. My job was to help other women look and FEEL beautiful.

Somehow I had managed to enter a world where beautiful literally WAS and IS in the eye of the beholder (and isn't it always?).

Over the last decade I have heard everything from ..."she's too exotic to work here" ...to "if she toned down her eye makeup and maybe cut her hair, we could work with her." Never mind my brain, my guts - my tenacity or ability to fearlessly ask politicians the tough questions. None of that seemed to matter at times.

Then there were the 5 consecutive years that City Weekly Readers voted me TV NEWS HOTTIE - cue the love & hate rhetoric the title bestowed.

I was flattered. Only because growing up I was a huge dork. The semi goth chick with a rock band named Rainbow Trash that never had a date to prom - was now "hot". Who wouldn't embrace that validation? The publication scrapped the category this year, 2014 - mostly because, according to several reliable sources they got so much flack for not recognizing me for more than just a pretty face. I appreciated the gesture, but I want everyone to know I found nothing insulting about being called hot.

Keep reading to find out why.

It's been 10 years now - working in television. Nearly 8 of them spent in Salt Lake City, Utah. And it took that long for some (not all, just some) people to realize - "she's more than just a pretty face." That's okay. It was worth every second of trudging through the deep muddy waters - worth every minute of climbing the steep ladder of success ...despite the double standards - regardless of the fact that men are just credible - by nature.

I'm not here to weep over why men have it better than women in TV news or in general (because they don't always have it better). I'm just saying that in the 21st Century - a time when women are climbing the corporate ladder - running for office - fighting for equal pay ...I, personally refuse to give up my sexy to be smart & successful.

There are many women who have given up their sexy (by choice) - in the name of being taken more seriously. While I find nothing wrong with women who choose or want to masculinize themselves to keep up with what is often referred to as "a man's world" - unapologetically, it's just not for me. And I don't want to be punished because I whole heartedly embrace what I consider part of my personal womanhood.

While we all try to strive for the same things - I just don't want women - who want to "have it all" to be pressured into giving up quintessential parts of themselves.

I know a woman can embody all three of those things (sexy, smart, successful) without sacrificing one for the other. And when I say "sexy" - I'm talking about my femininity. In the voyage to finding our place in the world - MY place in this universe ...I don't want to feel bad for being myself. I don't want to conform - or give up a piece of my identity just to be part of the ride.

I think Lisa Oz said it perfectly when she described Marie Forleo - who is credited with creating a multimillion dollar socially conscious empire from scratch.